The human is a complex being; so it stands to reason that interpersonal relations between two humans would be correspondingly complex. When people feel that they can no longer be a part of their marital union, they seek divorce as a solution to ending it. The reasons for divorce are as diverse as the people seeking it and can be even said to be culture specific.
While people don’t just focus on one reason for dissolving their marriage, but quote many for their decision, it has been seen that in the US, the most common reasons given for divorce are:
- Lack of commitment is the reason for divorce as quoted by nearly 73% of people. This then can be said to be the major reason behind divorce. If partners believe that they are in for the long run in a low conflict relationship and even if they aren’t too happy, they will prefer to continue to remain in the relationship with a hope of a healthy and stable marriage.
- 56% of people who go in for divorce stated that the incidence of arguments between them was too much to take for them to continue in their union.
- Adultery or infidelity was the deal breaker for 55% of people who believed that a straying spouse was the ultimate betrayal of their marriage.
- 46% people felt that the reason that their marriage was no longer working was because they had jumped into the marriage bandwagon at an early age when they were too young to know what they wanted in life, leave alone their choice of life partner.
- Almost 45% people said that unrealistic expectations regarding their marriage as well as of each other, had led to their union coming under strain. Unrealistic expectations can often be in turn, be caused by the lack of maturity and even young age of the marital partners. When partners are unwilling to bend from their point of view to understand the other’s, things become difficult for a relationship.
- An unequal relationship was found to be untenable by 44% of people who went in for divorce. A marriage of people, who felt themselves unequal to each other, be it in terms of physical and personal attractiveness, or even financial and mental strength, often caused feelings of insecurity to creep in leading to unhappiness and strain.
- 41% people felt that they hadn’t prepared sufficiently for the challenges of marriage, and thus were suffering because of its lack.
- Abuse has been quoted by 29% of the people as their main reason for going for divorce. Abuse covers both the mental as well as the physical aspects. Unfortunately, there is a big chunk of women who continue to stay on in abusive relationships for various reasons that range from the emotional to the financial.
The other not so common reasons for divorce can be said to be abandonment or desertion by one of the partners, mental illness, drug abuse, criminal conviction, impotency and religious issues.
While, it is felt by many that some of the issues are too difficult to surmount or resolve and divorce is the only way, it is also felt that some of the issues such as harmful and destructive arguments or adultery can be resolved with the help of an experienced counselor or religious figure.